to shed those old ways
by meltedwords
Summary: Her gloves had provided her with the semblance of protection, but they had also inspired fear. Elsa kept them inside a drawer of her nightstand, though Anna kept telling her she should throw them out for good.


The gloves were the hardest habit to break.

Elsa kept them inside a drawer of her nightstand, though Anna kept telling her she should throw them out for good, "Perhaps even into the sea! That could be fitting, more - more _final._" Her sister had smiled at the idea and reached out for the gloves that Elsa had put on, out of habit - and still, to some degree, fear.

It was the same with her treacherous left hand. Self-consciously, when she was feeling memories sneaking up on her mind, she would pull her hands to her chest, covering the left with the right.

If this were a perfect fairytale, her queenly duties could be shirked off for at least a few days, just a _few _to spend with her darling redheaded sister. Yet not even that would be enough to catch up - nothing would ever measure up to the years they had lost, only because they had all been misguided by fear and uncertainty - love far flung away, only left in its most basic and bare form, driven by the wrong purpose.

"Won't..." Elsa mumbled into a stack of papers she had rested her weary head on, "Won't hurt you again... Anna..." The words were partially cloaked by the papers covering half of her mouth, but Anna still made them out. She had been feeling peckish and had gone to the kitchens to grab some lunch, also deciding that it was about time for the queen to eat as well. She knew well enough that Elsa herself would skip lunch entirely if no one was around to pull her away from her load of work as she worked tirelessly to right all that had happened to Arendelle because of the icy storm that she had brought to it in the warmth of summer. The sudden changes that their kingdom had gone through in the matter of less than a couple of days had left its marks.

Anna stopped a few feet from her sister's desk, chewing on her lower lip. She held the tray with both hands, lest due to her clumsiness she drop it all and ruin all the hard work the staff had gone to for the queen and the princess. Thoughts ran rampant in her mind, wondering what Elsa could be dreaming of. The possibilities were nigh limitless, considering what the past several weeks had changed in Arendelle, not to mention their entire relationship.

* * *

_"So, well... you... know everything. Now." Elsa was hugging her arms to herself, another old habit that was extremely hard to kick - she doubted whether it would ever entirely disappear._

_Anna reached an arm out to her older sister, grasping her shoulder and squeezing it, "Of course, Elsa. And I still love you, even more than before!" Elsa tilted her head up, shy eyes meeting the other woman's. _

_"Not as if I didn't love you a lot before, I mean!" Anna quickly edited herself, laughing nervously. The adrenaline that had driven them to their absolute limits during the Great Freeze had dissipated in the few days since the Great Thaw had brought everyone back to the slow tease that reality brought them. _

_The younger girl brought her older sister into an embrace, wrapping grateful arms around the pale blonde. She sighed into Elsa's shoulders, trying to express everything she could into the close contact. _

_"Please don't ever forget how much I love you, Elsa," she whispered beside the queen's ear. Elsa had visibly relaxed at Anna's comforting words that brought her mind back to the present, the warm breath of her sister's words brushing her skin and hair. She was there, she was alive. The icy statue was no longer._

* * *

"Elsa... Elsa..."

The queen's eyes blearily blinked open, settling on her sister's face that sat close to her own, mere inches apart. She searched Anna's eyes and upon remembering flashes of her most recent dream, she moved suddenly, pushing her chair back and breathing shortly.

"A-Anna..." she breathed out.

The princess looked at her sister with concern, "Are you all right, Elsa?" She hated when her sister had dreams like the one she had just had - it had to be like the others, and fortunately she had been here this time when Elsa woke up from it. Anna moved closer to Elsa, reaching out and kneeling before the queen. Her outstretched arm rested on Elsa's thigh, rubbing small circles.

"Elsa," she said, a small pleading tone to her voice. She saw the tears resting at the edge of Elsa's eyelids, giving the blue eyes an unnatural shine to them. Elsa didn't blink them away this time. She breathed in heavily, shuddering as she let it go, feeling a line of tears fall over her cheeks. Anna stood up halfway, and situated herself on Elsa's lap, bringing Elsa's head to rest on her chest.

"A...Anna... please, you shouldn't be..." but Elsa couldn't finish. She swallowed and forced herself to say it, because her heart should surely burst if she kept it all in again; Anna had made her promise to never lock any of herself away _ever _again. At least from her own _sister_, the only family she had left.

She pulled her face away from Anna's chest, hardly able to look her little sister in the eye, but she still did, if only for a moment. "You... you shouldn't be near me."

She bit her tongue sharply and squeezed her eyes shut, "I'm sorry that I'm so dangerous." Her fingertips grew cold and she felt the ice on her forehead as her hands rested over her face, trying to make herself as small as possible. How was she supposed to rule this kingdom when she still couldn't completely rule her own emotionally-driven powers?

But Anna didn't leave. She resolved herself to _always _stay by her sister when she needed it, even when she didn't ask, when she couldn't bring herself to _need, _to _want_ and receive. That luxury hadn't been afforded her for over a decade, and Anna knew the blonde still wasn't sure how to navigate her new freedoms.

Not asking about the dream, because she knew Elsa would talk about it when she could, Anna only shushed her sister and pulled her hands away from her face, placing them in her own and rubbing them, warming the cool ice.

"I should have worn my gloves," the queen whispered. "I'm sorry."

Her eyes were distant, and Anna knew she had to act quickly, lest Elsa become trapped in the past once more. She wasn't even speaking to her anymore - Anna knew that Elsa must be remembering their parents, trying to speak to them.

"Elsa... _Elsa, _please, it's _me_, Anna," she moved her head closer to Elsa's, turning it a bit until she was able to place a soft kiss to her sister's cheek. She left her lips there for another moment, and then another kiss nearer to the queen's own lips. "You don't need the gloves... ever again_. Never_ again."

"But I..." Elsa's eyes were much closer now, searching Anna's face, moving a hand to Anna's cheek. The younger girl leaned into the slightly cool touch, warming it more with her own natural body heat. Elsa felt her powers stiffen, then relax with Anna's help that she couldn't even know she was providing.

Her heart hurt so badly, but it was in the best way she could imagine. Anna was so _selfless. _She glanced down at her left hand, the one that Anna still held within both of her own.

_The treacherous hand. _It had all crumbled because of it, the hand that had struck out at her sister not just once. And yet, here Anna was, holding it so closely and warmly within both of her own.

"But nothing," Anna said, pressing her forehead against Elsa's. The queen focussed her breathing, feeling her ice powers mellow as her heartbeat did, all while Anna settled more comfortably on her lap. Elsa felt herself smile softly, thankful for the gift of a sister she had been given.

The gloves were burned in a fireplace that same evening, all while Elsa lay on the sofa watching, her head resting in her little sister's lap. No words were shared, but neither needed them. Anna simply ran her fingers through Elsa's loosened braid, her other hand holding both of Elsa's.


End file.
